Hello, and welcome to my continued search for the definition of addiction. I’ve been sharing my journey as a young rescue mission worker striving to find a definition of addiction I could hang my hat on. This search was motivated by a desire to better understand the majority of people that I found at the Mission, and especially those in the program I was working in. They all struggled with addiction, and I wanted to find a definition that matched up with what I saw every day.

I had already examined definitions from the medical world and the psychological world while there were things that I liked about each of them, I did not find all I was looking for. Each left out a significant part of the experience I was seeing in my friends on a daily basis, so I continued to look for a definition I could genuinely identify with.That’s when it occurred to me that I was looking at outside sources for a definition. That is not to say that medical doctors or psychologists cannot also be addicts, but the ones who were in charge of writing the definitions and policies were most likely not. And even if they were, they were not writing from the perspective of an addict, they were writing from their professional position. To put it another way, if I really want to know what it is to be a dog, I am not going to ask a cat. To be completely honest, there is not much of anything I would ask a cat, I do have some standards.

The Inside Dope

What I was after was an inside perspective. I wanted to see what people who struggled with addiction said about their situation - how they would define their world. That is when I picked up the Big Book. No, not the Bible, but the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. You cannot get more of an insider perspective then this. AA is a program developed by addicts, and run by addicts for other addicts. If insider information is what you are looking for, AA is the place. The Big Book is comprised of stories, first person accounts and parables that describe not only the alcoholic’s experience, but also the process of recovery. AA has stood the test of time and proves to be a valuable resource and support system for those seeking recovery.As I read through my copy, I searched for what I could call a definition of addiction. I knew I was not going to find a clear statement, as I had in my previous two searches, but there had to be something I could use. That’s when I came across the famous 12 Steps (page 59, How it works). Almost everyone has heard of the 12 Steps, and their popularity has spread across pop psychology into all sorts of self-help industries. But the originals are still the best. Of those original 12, Step One is as good a definition as I could expect. It states “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.” Now this was a perspective I had not heard before.

The Blessing of Powerlessness

Two words jumped off the page at me, powerless and unmanageable. These two concepts seemed to be speaking to areas omitted from the medical and psychological definitions that I worked though earlier. Sure, someone can be functioning in daily life as an alcoholic or addict, but eventually, that runs out. They are living in situations that are unmanageable. Things are going too fast in too many different directions, and it cannot go on. Coming to that understanding is crucial in understanding addiction. The realization of powerlessness is also very important. Every addict or alcoholic I have talked to wants one thing more than anything else in the world, especially in early recovery. They want to be a social drinker or user. They have seen other people do it, why can’t they? That desire, control, has been the driving force behind their first few (dozen) recovery attempts. They try to cut back, to slow down and to bring their drinking under control. They want to manage something that is becoming unmanageable. Only when they finally admit that they are powerless can they actually begin a path of recovery. Once someone can admit that they are powerless, abstinence is the only option. Trying to change without surrender is just another thinly veiled attempt at control.

Subjectivity may be the death of me

There are a lot of things I liked about this definition. I liked the inside perspective. I liked the fact that it addresses aspects left out by other definitions. I liked that it starts with surrender. I was quickly getting on board with this definition. And yet... it still cannot stand on its own. At its root, the AA definition of addiction is subjective. It depends on each subject evaluating, on their own, how unmanageable their life is and how powerless they are over their substance of choice. A subjective definition with subjective evidence is, at the end of the day, just that: subjective. Without something objective, something based in evidence and fact, almost anyone can argue their way out of any situation. And remember, the brain is going to want to argue in favor of the addiction. It believes the drug is keeping it alive. So a rational evaluation of subjective circumstances may not be possible.I felt that I was one step closer to my definition, but not there yet. AA brings so much to the addiction community and its simplicity is beautiful. They finally provide an inside perspective to addiction that we can use in recovery - especially if we do not come from a history of chemical addiction ourselves. I was encouraged by the help from AA, but I knew there was more to discover...